Approval / Disapproval= Stress

Approval / Disapproval= Stress

How powerfully they play up in our lives! The craving for approval and subsequent fear of disapproval is often rooted in our vulnerability in childhood, based on how we were supposed to behave for survival. Reward or punishment are conditional upbringing methods, a means to control our behavior from our parents/teachers who themselves were subjected to this type of training. This has made us dependent on other people, dependent on their approval of us, on our acceptability from their world view point.

This is a source of STRESS.

When you experience pressure/stress it is quite possible that it is because someone else is expecting a particular response/ behavior that is not sitting comfortably with you, not only in the work place but at home and among friends. Although your environment has changed since you were a child and dependent on your parents for everything…mostly love and acceptance, these beliefs are still part of your operating system and surface from the subconscious level where they have firmly established themselves as a ‘belief’. If you think that you can’t leave your house without ‘your face on’ you might have adopted a need-to-look-good-at-all-times belief to be acceptable.

Your reaction to the cycle of  fear of criticism and approval for survival will derail your best intention to ‘be yourself’ and the addiction to approval makes you vulnerable to others’ manipulations and will drag your energy out of alignment.

We know, we have been conditioned to belong to a group/tribe and to be accepted is to survive and distancing oneself from the group/tribe is like a death. But..

The key is Becoming Aware of the conditioned need and releasing it will reduce the stress from our lives. Some people have mastered this well by using the unconventional methods of reality creation. (See Frederick E Dodson writings)


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